My heart belongs to my boys

I have three of the most amazing boys in my life... Pat, Cole and Connor. I've been incredibly blessed to have Pat in my life for over twenty years. We have countless memories together and we thoroughly enjoyed making new memories with our little fellas. Autism has thrown a curve ball at us but we try very hard to make the most of it. Outings take a lot more planning and sometimes there are things we simply can't do. 

We were fortunate to enjoy the Ham Lake Snow Bowl last Saturday. It was a rather warm winter day. We bundled the kids up and headed to the lake near our house. We had a fun time and the kids did great! We saw a ton of dogs. Cole is deathly afraid of dogs but he was so brave. He kept saying, "Dogs are on a leash, not going to get you". We got to walk out onto the lake where we take the boat in the summer. Cole loved that part, he even laid down on the ice just to take it all in. He got a kick out the trees that were on the lake (for ice golfing) and he loved seeing snowmobiles and 4-wheelers tooling around the lake. Soon enough, it was time for a unique kind of sled dog race. There were nearly 100 dogs in a race where they pull their owners on cross country skis. We watched the dogs race down the path, one after another. There were all kinds of dogs and it was so neat to see. Cole and Connor got a chance to jump and play in the snow together. I took a lot of pictures and we had a great morning together. 

I was so happy to do this activity as a family. Not long ago, this is something we would not attempt. Slowly, Cole is becoming more adaptable and cooperative when we go out in public. It wasn't stressful for us and we all had a wonderful time together. 

On Sunday, we had plans to spend the afternoon at my sister's house to celebrate my birthday. We prepped Cole for this and thought he would cooperate. For some reason, he had anxiety about it all day long. The time came for us to leave and Cole refused to go. He cried and cried, and got many stand up, sit downs (I'll explain those in a later entry). We offered to have everyone come here and he kept saying, "Just us. No everyone today. Want to go swimming at the Y". So a half hour after we were supposed to be at my sister's, Connor and I ran out of the house and sped out of the garage before Cole could get outside to stop us. 

I called Pat every twenty minutes or so to see if he thought they would make it. It was always the same response. Cole was still upset and refused to come. So Pat and Cole missed my birthday celebration. It was one of those times that just wasn't meant to be, and that's ok. 

So we got home around 7pm and Cole was waiting for me at the door. I walked in and he said, "Hi Mommy!!! Go to Y? Go swimming with Mommy and Connor." So at 7:15pm on a Sunday night, we all packed up our things and drove down to the Y by my parents (the one close to our house is too loud for Cole). We had a fun time at the pool and it was rewarding to see the progress Cole has made with his swimming. It sure wasn't the way most families spend 7:30-9pm on a school night, but it was worth it. 

Cole had a good day at MAC the next day and was glad to get back into his routine. I opened up his backpack that night and he made me a homemade Valentine. It was written in his handwriting and is just so precious. Cole loves us so much. He tells us every day and he shows us every day. Tonight, after Cole got Connor's "movie rest" set up, I asked him to give Connor a kiss goodnight. Cole leaned over and gave Connor a big kiss and said, "I love you Connor. I love you Connor." He does love us, there is no doubt in my mind.