Monday, March 15, 2010

My little daredevil






Cole had quite an exciting Wednesday last week. The morning started off with a visit to the dentist. Part of me can't believe I'm actually typing this, but Cole had been looking forward to this appointment for months.

For those who don't know, the dentist and dental hygiene have been one of our most challenging things with Cole. It is hard to put the intensity of his dental fear into words. We have tried medications, picture schedules, Velcroe body jackets, books, etc. to get Cole comfortable with the dentist. It got so bad that we couldn't drive down the road that lead to our former dentist and the last time we got Cole into the building, he was so full of anxiety that he smashed his head into the inner brick walls of the building. We lost all hope until we got the recommendation of Dr King.

Dr King is a wonder-worker. Actually, the bulk of the credit should go to his amazing hygienist, Marlene. Wednesday was our third visit with Dr King. The first time, Cole went to the office and just looked around. He took a ride in the chair and that was it. At that time, the decision was made to put Cole under general anesthetic to clean his teeth and do any necessary work. The second time we visited Dr King's office, Cole got to perform a teeth cleaning on a teddy bear. He loved it and even sat in the chair himself. He let Marlene count his teeth and "polish" his two front teeth with her special tool. Dr King also got a quick exam in.

This time around, Cole was super excited. He could not wait to work on the bear and turn up the music in Marlene's special room. When it was Cole's turn, he sat right down and Marlene went to work. He let her clean, polish and floss all of his teeth. We had to take a few breaks, but he made it. When Dr King came in, he let him examine his teeth. The only time Cole had anxiety was when it was time to paint his teeth with fluoride. He didn't like it at all and we had to restrain him slightly. It stressed him out, but in the end he survived and had white shiny teeth to prove it! When I think back to our troubles related to this, I'm amazed at the tolerance and progress Cole has shown. The true test will be in September when he knows what he's in for. He's already told me, "only bear in September, not Cole". Something tells me he will do just fine.

That night, we rewarded Cole by taking him to Nick Universe at the Mall of America. Cole was beyond excited and so happy to have his family there with him. He, Pat and Connor went on almost every ride. It was so much fun to see Cole leading us around the park. He knew where everything was; from the Gatorade machine to the ferris wheel entrance and the mini golf course to Dairy Queen. It was like we had our own tour guide. The boys had a great time and I was amazed at how much they loved the "crazy" rides!! We would take Cole there a lot if it weren't so darn expensive- although it's worth it to see the grin on his face.

Tonight we told Cole about our upcoming vacation. Pat and I will be leaving Thursday for Ixtapa. It will be our 6th year in a row. We are incredibly blessed to have wonderful family members who help with the boys while we are gone. They understand how important this break is for us and just how much we need a reprieve from our often hectic home life. Cole was quite sad when he glanced at his picture schedule. He crumpled it up and said, "Mommy and Daddy aren't going on vacation. They are not going on a plane." Tears came to his eyes and he was truly sad. Slowly, as the night wore on and after slamming a few doors, Cole came to grips with the situation and appears to be ok. As much as he adores his grandparents, this coming week will be hard for him. He'll miss us as much as we miss him. Keep him in your prayers.

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

SURPRISE!!!!





We have had so much fun with Cole over the past few weeks. He's been in a great mood and now that we've gotten over the hump with the increased difficulty of his stand up, sit downs, things have been going well with him. He is talking in more complete sentences and keeps surprising us with his progress. He shows us so much love and affection. We know he adores us and his brother, Connor. The two boys are the perfect match for one another. Cole has such strong admiration for Connor. He looks up to him and wants to be a lot like him. Connor is truly amazing with Cole. I wish there is a way I could give him the credit he deserves. Connor is mature far beyond his years and the intuition, empathy and compassion he shows for Cole inspire me. It's so wonderful to see Connor enjoy Cole's increased play skills. There are so many more age-appropriate activities they play together. They are great pals and have so much fun playing the Wii, sledding, playing games, wrestling, skating and doing homework together. The other day Connor said to me as the boys were playing at the table, "Mom, I just love Cole's smile. See, there it is again." I mean seriously, how many brothers say that about one another. And this happens nearly every day with Connor. He has the most positive, supportive attitude when it comes to Cole and his Autism. It's amazing... he's amazing.

Cole turned nine on February 28th. I can't believe I have a nine-year-old. It seems like just yesterday when we were putting together his nursery and here he is wearing size 10 jeans and weighing over 70 pounds. Our journey with Cole hasn't been exactly what we signed up for. Someone said to me this past week, "it's like planning a trip to Italy but when you land, you are in Russia." It's still a wonderful trip, but it's not what you planned. In our case, we did spend close to 3 years in Italy and then one day, our tour guide said, "You thought you were in Rome? You guys have been in Moscow for three years. Does that explain why some things haven't made sense?"

We hosted a surprise party for Cole on Saturday. He had absolutely no idea. It was the day before his actual birthday, so he wasn't expecting a party that day, nor had he asked about one. We had all of our immediate family over and waited anxiously for his PCA, Alli, to drop him off. We crowded into the living room, hidden from sight. Everyone, even seven little kids, kept very quiet as Cole came home. He walked up the stairs and everyone yelled, "SURPRISE!!!!". Cole's reaction was priceless. He covered his ears and looked very shy and excited at the same time. He kept saying, "Wow... wow. It's a surprise party for me!" He took time to process what was going on. Cole would walk into his room and talk to himself about what was happening and then he would come out and show his excitement to the crowd. This process took about five minutes. He had so much fun and was so proud to turn nine.

We also had a lot of fun at hockey this week. Cole had practice on Sunday. He was so happy to have Connor skating with him. Connor did an outstanding job leading Cole through practice and the drills. It brought us so much joy to see them skating together. Cole is so athletically gifted and to see him skate so well after 6-7 times on the ice is impressive. Sadly the hockey season comes to an end next week. I'm in the process of signing him up for Special Olympics. I just need to decide which of the spring sports suits him best. In a few months, he'll also start Miracle League baseball and just this past weekend, the boys started an adaptive bowling league together as well. You can check out a neat video of Cole and Connor skating together at: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R-B2_Nfz1T0

We are looking forward to this weekend. Cole will have his first "friend birthday party". We invited 10 kids to come celebrate at the bowling alley with Cole. I can't wait to see his reaction and to see the joy on his face. He might not have a lot of friends, but the ones he does have are kids he cares for very deeply. We are blessed to have some very special cousins and friends in Cole's life.

Life is full of surprises. Whether you land in Germany when you thought you were headed for Peru or if a crowd of adoring people shout "surprise" to you, embrace life and all the unexpected blessings. We have been on quite a detour for the past six years and there have been countless things to be thankful for along the way. And yes, we'll get to Italy some day but for now Russia is where we need to be.