As the mom of a special needs child, I often need to remind myself of that reality. I see Cole as the little boy I adore and often look past his numerous challenges. I have to stop and tell myself that Cole has special needs. Yes, we live it every single day but at the end of the day, Cole is our son and the only thing that matters is our deep love for him.
I do admit, however, there are times when I assume there are things he can not do. And most often, Cole is able to prove me wrong. I try to "let out the rope" and give Cole the independence and opportunity to do the things boys his age do. Many times I find myself overly cautious and concerned for his safely and well-being.
A few years ago, an old school friend suggested we have Cole play in the special hockey league at Schwan's Super Rink. I quickly dismissed it. I couldn't imagine Cole learning to skate, let alone wearing the necessary equipment. Last year, Connor got skates for Christmas and began skating himself. Cole took interest to it and this year, we decided to give it a try. So every Sunday at 4:20, our family heads off to the Super Rink for MN Special Hockey. It has been the best experience. Cole LOVES putting on the pads and equipment. He has his own jersey (#19) and he loves going to see Coach Chris and his hockey friends. One week there is practice and the next is a game. It is so fun to see Cole skate around the rink. He skates really well and loves to go fast and slide on the ice. He's also known to shoot on his own goalie... oh well! It's so nice to have a safe environment for Cole and young adults with disabilities. Cole loves that we are there for him and he's made us very aware of that. It really made me stop and think. He wants affirmation and a sense of belonging just like we do. And it's our job to provide that for him.
Cole is also learning some age-appropriate play skills. He's been playing his favorite game, Guess Who, with us. It's a game where he has to ask questions about our secret person to determine who our person is. He does an amazing job asking questions correctly and asking questions that allow him to use his deductive reasoning. He has beat me fair and square countless times. It's fun because Connor loves to play as well.
We also had a close friend give a used Nintendo DS to Cole. He was so excited and with a little help from Connor, he figured out how to use it and now plays Mario Kart on the DS. It will be so nice to bring with us when we are out and about. The other day we brought Cole to Connor's hockey game. Cole got a little antsy, so we let him play the DS. It was nice to have something fun for him to do while watching the game. It also helps him sit still (and safe) in the truck. Thanks so much Mel!!!!
He's also mastered Mario Kart on the Wii. With the help of MAC and Connor, Cole has learned how to play Wii games and now gets 1st or 2nd place in nearly every race he's in. The boys enjoy playing together and it's so nice to have an activity for him that other kids his age are playing. And it's wonderful to have something fun to do inside during these cold winter months!
We are working on plans for Cole next school year. Right now, we are thinking he will attend McKinley (his home school where Connor goes) starting in September. He'll go there in the morning and then head to MAC for the remainder of the afternoon. Cole is SO excited to go to school where Connor, his cousin and friends go. Cole has never been in a main-stream school, so I think the part-time transition will suit him well. I'm starting the process of many, many meetings to get things underway. Lots of meetings, assessments, paperwork, more meetings and other important things. Managing Cole's care is a tremendous amount of work, but I get so much joy from seeing things fall into place for him.
Cole is really looking forward to his upcoming birthday. He will turn NINE on February 28th. We are so excited for him. He loves birthdays and surprises. We are planning a family surprise party for him and I'm in the midst of planning his first-ever friend party. I can't wait for that!
Speaking of birthdays, I just celebrated mine this past weekend. I'm so fortunate for all of the people who came out to celebrate with me. We had so much fun at Tanners and POVs. I shared a picture taken at Tanners with a few of my high school friends. It was such a fun night and made turning thirty-something a little easier.
Thanks for taking the time to read my blog. I even get requests and questions as to when I'm going to post another entry. I love to hear those comments. It's hard to know if people read this and to get feedback is very reassuring. Cole is so fortunate to have so many people on his team. We all have a part in helping him and it's paying off in a big way... after all, look what he can do!!!
